Archive: March, 2010

March 18, 2010

Can Men and Women Just Be Friends?

Ask 100 people and you could get 100 different answers.

Only if they are single.

Only if they’ve never had sex.

Absolutely!

Sometimes.

Never.

It’s a very personal decision.  And it involves intention and boundaries.  If you are in a partnership, what kind of boundaries do you need to have around any friendships?  And how can you make your relationship a priority so that the lines of friendship don’t get blurred?

We talked about this topic on Keep It Local.  See what you need to pay attention to so that you don’t damage your relationship while pursuing friendships.

Filed under: Relationship — admin @ 7:33 pm

March 10, 2010

The Ooh Baby Baby Kiss!

When is the last time you kissed your partner?  I’m not talking about a peck on your way out the door or an obligatory kiss as part of foreplay.  When is the last time you shared a really good kiss?  I call those kinds of kisses “Ooh Baby Baby Kisses.”

Sometimes in relationships we forget about ooh baby baby kissing.  We are busy with work or kids or life in general.  We stick with pecking or quick kisses because they feel easier.  Sometimes we worry that if we do give in to a long luxurious kiss that will mean we need to do something else…we might have to have sex after that long kiss.  But think back, think back to the beginning of your relationship or think back to your first few kisses.  Think back to a time where a kiss was a kiss and you really enjoyed it.  What would it be like to bring that kind of kiss into your relationship?  What would it be like to swoop up to your partner today and plant a big ole kiss right on his/her lips?  Not an obligatory kiss, but a kiss full of intention.  A kiss that says, “I’m attracted to you.” or “I really love you.” or “I miss the days when we fooled around.”  And who doesn’t want to feel that their partner really wants to kiss them?

If things feel a little predictable or even stale in your relationship, an ooh baby baby kiss might be just enough to spice things up.  And even if things feel good, an ooh baby baby kiss, won’t hurt.  It’s one small thing you can do for your relationship today.  It doesn’t cost money, it won’t take a ton of time.  So pucker up and put a little spice back in your relationship today!

Filed under: Intimacy, Relationship, Romance — admin @ 10:16 pm

March 3, 2010

What if your partner doesn’t want to make your relationship a priority?

It can be really hard to feel like you are more invested in your relationship than your partner is.  If you feel this way, how do you know it’s the case?  Have you talked to your partner about connecting more and gotten a negative response?  Or are you just waiting to see if your partner will make the first move.  Sometimes partners are waiting for each other to take action, they are both invested, but both hoping the other will do something first.  So before you assume your partner isn’t interested, it’s important to find out for sure.

Rather than turning to your partner and saying, “I want to make our relationship a priority, do you?” you can start with, “I miss connecting with you, can we do something special this week?”  Making your relationship a priority doesn’t have to be a chore.  I can be a fun, sexy infusion for your relationship.

Here are a few ways you can help your partner make your relationship a priority.

  • Tell your partner why it’s important to you
  • Treat your partner they way you want to be treated
  • Schedule something fun – dinner, a get away or even a sexy night in

You can see more about this topic if you watch the video from my visit to Keep It Local.

    Filed under: Intimacy, Relationship, Romance — admin @ 6:36 pm

    March 1, 2010

    Talkin’ about the birds and the bees!

    On Wednesday I will be talking about sex on “Keep It Local.”  Do you want to learn tips for initiating with your parter?  Or are you looking for ways to spice up your sex life?  If you have a question or a particular topic you would like me to address you can send me an email – julie@portlandsextherapy.com.

    Filed under: Intimacy, Sexuality — admin @ 9:15 pm