Talkin’ Dirty!

June 1st, 2010 by admin in Intimacy, Sexuality
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1132815028-3931“I love it when you _______”   “I want you to _______”  “_______ me!”

Talking Dirty!  When we think of a “sexy woman” that is one of the things we think about right?  She is comfortable in the bedroom and can speak her mind.  Sometimes if feels like she was just born sexy, right?  You might think, ‘well she IS sexy, I’m not!’  The great thing about talking dirty is that it is something you can learn.  (and if you aren’t feeling sexy, you should go back to my previous post and do some of those things to help yourself feel sexy!)

The first thing you can do is respond when something is said to you.  You know how awful it feels to say something to your partner and feel like he isn’t listening…well if your partner is trying to talk sexy to you and you are silent, it feels the same way!  When your partner says something sexy and you don’t know what to say in return…a smile, a moan or a little squeeze can help him feel heard.  The next level would be for you to say something.  And the easiest thing is to comment on what is going  “You’re kissing me right now” or “You are touching me here” or “I can feel you inside of me.”  Of course, you can make it racier or sexier and that will take it to the next level.

This is where the “dirty” comes in!  But dirty doesn’t mean you have to use words that offend you or make you uncomfortable…it can mean sexy or sassy or just being a bit surprising.  Now you talk about what you want or what excites you…and your excitement and desire is often what is most exciting for your partner.  So “I love it when you ____” or “I want you to ___” or “It’s so sexy when you ___.”  Throw in a few expletives and a moan and you’ve become a pro!

The thing to remember is that this is a learned behavior.  You don’t have to go from giggling when someone says sex to dropping the “F-bomb” overnight.  Start somewhere that is comfortable to you.  Start by just making sounds.  Then comment on what is happening.  And before you know it you will be whispering (or yelling) those sexy sentiments!

One Response to “Talkin’ Dirty!”

  1. Finding Your Voice in the Bedroom! Says:

    […] the idea of talking dirty make you freeze or start to giggle?  Sometimes learning to talking dirty can feel like learning a […]