Archive: May, 2014

May 30, 2014

Savoring Your Moments

Life is full of moments. Some are hard, some are beautiful, some are painful, some are joyful – all are fleeting.

I’m back in Portland after 2 weeks in Paris. If you had asked me how the trip was during journey I would have had a different response every day. At 3 in the morning when we had been up for hours I would have said it was hard or exhausting. When my daughter walked under the Eiffel Tower focusing on the ground and collecting rocks instead of the noticing the monument I would have said it was surprising. When I was charged a ridiculous amount for a ride from the airport I would have said it was frustrating. When met new friends (who happen to also live in Portland) and watched our daughters play in the sand together I would have said it was connecting. When I was walking in my neighborhood, soaking up the cobblestone, flower-filled balconies, and watching people at cafes I would have said it was perfect.

Paris balconies

Now as I look back on the trip as a whole, it’s true parts were hard, it’s also true that it was one of the most important things I’ve done. I traveled to Europe with a 2 year old. I faced fears, I embraced joy, I engaged my senses – I realized how strong I am. I learned and experienced so much!

The last day of the trip it felt like everything was going wrong. There were so many obstacles and I had such high hopes for the day. There was a moment when I wondered, “Why did I do this?” I heard all of the voices of people who suggested my daughter was too young to enjoy it, it would be too much for me or too expensive or I should wait. And for a few hours I bought into those voices. I wrote in my journal about how hard it was and about all of the things I didn’t get to do that I had wanted to do. The next morning I carried all of our luggage down 2 flights of stairs, climbed into a taxi with my daughter and watched the Paris landscape disappear as we drove to the airport. I piled our suitcase, the pack ‘n play, her stroller and my laptop bag on a cart, picked up my sleeping baby in my other arm and rolled the luggage cart around the airport. I practiced my french as I asked someone where to check-in. As I turned to find the correct desk, I stopped and I was overcome by such a sense of pride. I stood in the middle of Charles De Gaulle airport, arms aching from the weight of my baby, as people from other countries hurried around me and I felt so strong and so content. On the flight home all of the joy and excitement and passion and adventure came flooding back. I was able to sit and enjoy the memory of some magical moments.

It’s so important to feel what we are feeling. I needed to acknowledge the hard and let myself feel the disappointment about the last day. As I feel my feelings they move through me and I can truly savor all of the special moments from my trip (and my life).

There was the moment we were out to coffee and my daughter pointed up above and said “tweet tweet” and I saw a trapped bird. On the way home from that cafe we found a snail shell and countless rocks (or “heart rocks” as she calls them after finding a rock in the shape a heart and hearing me call it a “heart rock”).

Paris Bird

There was the moment we waited in a long line to get ice cream on ile st louis…and the reward we experienced when we tasted the cone with a scoop of pistachio and a scoop of coconut (I’m still dreaming of that ice cream and I think she is too).

There was the moment a young man asked if I wanted help carrying my stroller up the stairs in a metro station. I took the top of the stroller, he took the bottom, his friend faced my daughter and they sang to each other as we climbed 3 flights of stairs.

There was the moment when we first arrived and decided to head out to explore after a nap. We ended up at a boulangerie I used to frequent when I was last in Paris. We got a chausson aux pommes (just like I used to) and sat in the park where I used to journal. I shared my daughter’s first french pastry with her and remembered how 3 years ago I sat in that park and wrote about being ready to have a child and dreamed about my future baby.

There was the moment I walked along the Champs Elysee and felt this –

‘My heart has wings. Today it nearly flew right out of my chest. Or burst…but not in a bad way, in a “I don’t know how there is any more room in here, I’m so incredibly full!”‘

Paris Flowers

There was the moment I sat at the Rodin Museum a little disappointed because I wasn’t feeling well and some of the rooms weren’t open and my daughter looked at me, started laughing and took off down the path. She toddled along with her arms raised, she would look back to see if I was following and just laugh and laugh and laugh.

Paris Rodin Daphne

There was the moment we blew bubbles out of our apartment window and watched a group of school kids chase them below.

Paris Bubbles

There were so many moments where I connected to my senses, engaged with all the parts of Paris that I love and truly reconnected to who I am. And there were so many moments where I acknowledged my strength and learned new things about who I am and who I am becoming.

So

Paris Eiffel

Many

Paris sky

Special

Paris Street

Moments

Paris Sunset

As you go through your day, your week, your year – what moments can you savor? Even today, can you stop and really connect with what happened this morning or yesterday? There was the moment your child said something for the first time or your partner introduced you to a new food or someone said something really kind or you paused for 15 seconds and felt peace. There was the new pose in your yoga class or the new rose in bloom on your rose bush or the moment your dog nuzzled up next to you and exposed his belly for a scratch. There was the first sip of your morning coffee, dandelions blowing in the breeze or the ecstasy of clean sheets against your weary body. There were kisses (did you let yourself linger and lean in?) and laughter and maybe some tears.

Savoring your moments is different than clinging to them. You can live in the present and also savor what happened recently (or even a while ago). Savoring allows you to feel gratitude. It allows you to feel joy (and sometimes pain). It allows you the opportunity to honor the truth of your life.

Life is full of moments. Some are hard, some are beautiful, some are painful, some are joyful – all are fleeting.

Looking for more information about Paris and Sensuality? Read my May newsletter – Greetings From Paris – A Lesson in Sensual Living. Subscribe to my newsletter here.

Filed under: Gratitude, Live Your Best Life, Paris — admin @ 3:19 pm

May 24, 2014

My Parisian Affair!

rodin affair

Are you feeling stuck, uninspired or disconnected from who you are?  Do you think a relationship with a new person will help?

What lights you up?

What helps you reconnect to who you are?

Filed under: Live Your Best Life, Paris, Relationship, Romance, Self-love, Video — admin @ 11:40 am

May 17, 2014

All Roads Lead to Love

roads lead to love

Right now I’m sitting in my Paris apartment and there is a couple kissing in the street below my window.  They are stopped in the middle of the cobblestone street wrapped up in each other’s embrace.

The past 24 hours have been a bit topsy turvy. I originally thought my daughter was just taking a bit to adjust to the time change…but then yesterday she developed a cough and she was up most of the night. I finally got her to sleep at 10am…and while I wanted to do some writing I was delirious with sleep-deprivation so I went to bed too.  And then I didn’t wake up until 2:45pm!  And she woke up at 3:15pm.  We are both hungry and a bit disoriented.  My head started filling with all of the adventures we could go on, but I was a little apprehensive about her stroller on the metro and I’m still unsure of the bus system (plus even though a part of me really wanted to “do something” I didn’t want to take her too far if she was still feeling sick).  So I decided we would just explore a different part of our neighborhood and pick up a few more groceries.

We wandered.  We stopped for a croissant aux amande at a random boulangerie and it was superb.  We wandered some more.  We window shopped, pointed out dogs and pigeons and watched people enjoying drinks and food at different cafes. And then I was surprised to see a carousel and decided to take her over for a closer look.  It was packed and I spotted a little garden and thought we would sit for a minute and eat our snack.  We were watching birds and eating pastries and I looked up and saw the “I Love You Wall” right in front of me.  I had almost forgotten about this gem.  It wasn’t on the list of places I want to visit this time around…but here it was.  Here was the perfect spot for us to eat and pause and soak up the love and we just happened upon it.

It’s amazing where you end up when you just start moving.  Whether you are making out in the street, or pushing your baby up a 60 degree incline for blocks and blocks or training for your first 5K – All Roads Lead to Love.

Filed under: Love, Paris — admin @ 12:00 pm

May 11, 2014

Love for all the Mamas!

Wising a very happy Mother’s Day to all moms and mothering people!

Your love, dedication and support of your children and people you nurture makes this world a better place!

moms day

Filed under: Gratitude, Holidays, Love, Parenting — admin @ 8:54 am

May 7, 2014

Boundaries – Protection or Punishment?

Love Locks

What comes up for you when you read the word “boundaries?”

Do you envision something healthy?  An unachievable ideal? A huge iron wall keeping people out?  Or a fence that protects you?

How does a healthy boundary feel?

I often see people who have very open boundaries or “no boundaries” or people who have very rigid or closed boundaries. When your boundaries are minimal it’s easy to take on other people’s energy or feelings. It’s very hard to say no or speak up about what you want or need.  Without some boundaries it’s easy to get lost.  If your boundaries are super rigid, it’s hard to be in relationship with another person…it’s hard to get close to someone or truly let yourself be seen.

Imagine a young child.  It’s important to have some boundaries to keep a child safe. You don’t want her to run into the street or eat something harmful or do something dangerous.  You want her safe.  At the same time if you over-protect her, she doesn’t get to experience anything.  She may grow up fearful or anxious.  You won’t take risks.  She will continue to be dependent.  She may feel isolated.

So we look for something in the middle.  We look for boundaries that protect us, but also don’t shut others out. This can be hard if you’ve been hurt…it’s so easy to want to shut everyone out.  It’s easy to say it’s to protect our hearts, to keep use safe.

But our hearts want to love and connect and grow.

Are you setting boundaries to protect yourself or are you setting them out of fear?

Are you setting boundaries to punish someone?

If’ you’ve been hurt are you withdrawing or isolating to cause someone else pain?

I love what my friend Pixie says about boundaries.

She is offering a 2 week e-course about boundaries. It starts May 19th and she’s given me a spot to giveaway!  Are you ready to explore your boundaries and get clear about setting and maintaining healthy boundaries? Leave a comment below or the post on my Facebook page and I will enter you into the drawing.  How do you struggle with boundaries?  What do you want to shift? I’m picking a a name on the 12th!

Filed under: Boundaries, Class, Relationship — admin @ 9:06 pm

May 4, 2014

Shower Yourself with Love – Self Study Course

Shower-Yourself-with-LoveWe just finished a wonderful 4-weeks of self-love! Now you can bask in the love and honor your worthiness at home with the Shower Yourself with Love Self-Study PDF!

Here’s what you get –

  • 45 page PDF with 4 weeks worth of content
  • 4 videos
  • 2 Spreecast Recordings
  • Tons of exercises, activities and writing prompts
  • Small ways to make yourself a priority or practice self love

Topics

  • Self love – what is it, what does it feel like, where does it come from?
  • What gets in the way of self-love?
  • Is self-love selfish?
  • Self-esteem (how is that different than self-love?)
  • Telling your inner critic to pipe down!
  • Self-care vs. Self-love – How are they different? How are they connected?
  • Being your own best lover
  • Loving your body and your sexual self
  • Ways to feel love EVERY day
  • Acceptance
  • Boundaries
  • Self-responsibility
  • Honoring Your Feelings
  • Perfectionism

Schedule –

  • Week 1 – What is self-love?
  • Week 2 – What gets in the way of self-love?
  • Spreecast – Quieting your inner critic.
  • Week 3 – Creating a loving relationship with your body.
  • Week 4 – Embrace your wonderful you-ness!
  • Spreecast – Are you trying to be perfect?
  • ***Plus 30 Days of Bonus Self-Love Reminders to keep self-love on your radar!**

Purchase this class for $39!

Add to Cart

Even if you do fundamentally feel loveable and love yourself…how often do you treat yourself with love? What about showering yourself with love? This is an opportunity to spend an entire month learning about what helps you feel lovable and doing things to help you feel loved.

Now is a great time to give yourself (or a woman you love) the gift of self-love!

Shower yourself with love!

Filed under: Class, Self-love, Women — admin @ 2:57 pm

May 2, 2014

No More Sleeping Beauty!

 Flaming June by Fredrick Lord Leighton

Flaming June by Fredrick Lord Leighton

Are you waiting for someone to come along and wake you up, sexually?

Are you hoping the right person will be able to teach you what you like and unlock your potential for pleasure?

I have talked with many women who shared that they wish a guy would come into their life and magically teach them how to fully embrace their sexuality.  I can understand the fantasy.  It sounds really appealing to have someone unlock your body’s pleasure.  It may feel like a relief to imagine someone who totally understands you and can share that information.  I suppose it is possible that the right person may come along at the right time in your life and have all of the right tools help you embrace your sexual pleasure.  However, I’ve never heard of that actually happening.  And if it’s what you are waiting for, you may have to wait a very long time.

Imagine if someone came to you and wanted you to teach them everything about their body? Would you feel excited? Honored? Overwhelmed Annoyed? Imagine the disappointment they might feel if you weren’t able to know all of the secret treasures…all of the specific kind of touch or areas that are pleasurable Imagine their resentment when you aren’t able to reach them in the way they imagined and imagine your frustration that they expect so much from you.

Sex with another person can show us things and teach us things and feel amazing. But you know what is even more amazing? - knowing your body, loving your body and then sharing that information with someone and building on that together.

Your pleasure is your responsibility. Yes, a partner can help. Yes, a partner can give you pleasure. And yes, you are more likely to feel pleasure with a partner if you know what you find pleasurable to begin with.

The BEST way to learn what feels good sexually is to find out on your own. Be your own best lover! You can then take the information you learn about your body and your pleasure and share it with your lover.  It’s possible you will then learn more about your body through your connection with your lover.  I hope that your pleasure can expand and grow with your partner. Start with your own understanding of your body and what feels good.  Start with connecting to yourself and your pleasure and then add connection with your partner to increase the experience.

Here are a few ways to connect with yourself –

Learn about sex and your body

Seduce yourself

Be Your Own Best Lover

Give Yourself Pleasure

Discover Who You Are Sexually

Empower yourself sexually! Don’t play the role of sleeping beauty, waiting for a prince to come along and wake you up sexually. Wake yourself up! Become a student of your body and your sexuality.

Filed under: Self-love, Sexual Being, Sexuality — admin @ 10:47 am