Archive: January, 2015

January 28, 2015

Prioritize Your Sexuality

Sex reminder

If you could have taken a peek into my home last night, you would have found me walking from the bathroom to my room to my daughters room over and over and over again. This month I bought an activity tracker that counts my steps and at the end of the day I was trying to beat my daily average. So I was walking in circles trying to get an additional 500 steps. I know that without my tracker I wouldn’t have any reason to be walking in circles. Without my tracker, taking steps wouldn’t even be on my radar. I love that I have a new form of accountability to help encourage being active.

I started to think about sex. Without my tracker, taking steps wouldn’t be a priority. What could help people get sex on their radar? I know that some people don’t need any help. Some people think about sex during their day. Some people see an attractive person and start to fantasize. Some people have a sexy dream. Some people find sex popping into their heads at inopportune times. However, I hear from many people (women especially) who just don’t think about sex. They have so many other things going on, it just doesn’t make the list. Some of these people don’t like sex or aren’t interested in it. Many of them report that they actually like sex when they are having it, they just don’t think about having it. Just like I didn’t think about getting another 500 steps at the end of my day.

Here are some ways to get sex on your radar -

  • Set a reminder on your phone. Every time it goes off, pause for a minute and remind yourself that you are a sexual being.
  • Read erotica before bed.
  • Find a totem or talisman. Carry something with you that reminds you of sex. Perhaps it’s a piece of jewelry or a special stone or a small figure. When you see this totem, let yourself dream about sex.
  • Make a sex date.
  • Be in your body. Move, dance, walk, masturbate, connect to your body. It’s easy to feel disconnected, the more you connect to your body, the easier it will be to connect to your sexual center.
  • Plan a sexy getaway.
  • Practice Sensuality – tune into your senses throughout your day. The more you connect with your senses, the more you connect with your body and the present moment.
  • Cultivate Pleasure – you can have pleasure in and out of the bedroom. The more in touch you are with pleasure in general, the easier it will be to translate that to sexual pleasure. What gives you pleasure? What do you enjoy? What feels good?
  • Write – “Sex” or “I’m sexy” or “Explore Your Sexuality” on sticky notes and place them there you will find them throughout the week. When you see a sticky note check in with your sexual barometer
  • Have a weekly sex check-in with your partner. Talk about how you are feeling and what you are wanting.

There is no shame in needing a sexual reminder. Help yourself be accountable and use some tools to make sex a priority.

Filed under: Sexual Being, Sexuality — admin @ 2:41 pm