Archive: Video

June 26, 2012

How do you negotiate with your partner?

  • Scream and fight until you get your way?
  • Keep silent, let him “win” and then fume and hold resentment?
  • Perhaps you cuddle up together and calmly talk things out?

Mostly likely, it’s some combination of the above…or perhaps it looks nothing like the above.  The truth is you are going to have to bend or compromise or negotiate at some time in your relationship.

We talked about negotiating with your partner on KOIN Studio 6.  You can see the video here.

Sometimes compromise stinks! We talk about compromise being such a wonderful thing…but sometimes it’s really hard.  And it’s not always possible to compromise on some topics (you can’t have half a baby).  When you are negotiating, know what’s really important to you.  What are you willing to bend on?  What can’t you budge on?  Be very clear about what you want and also what your partner wants and what’s best for your relationship.

If your negotiation tactics are causing a fight, you might find this post about fair fighting helpful.

Filed under: Communication,Relationship,Video — admin @ 1:38 pm

December 28, 2011

You Don’t Have to be a Sexy Tiger!

I am so excited about this new group I am offering.  If you’ve been visiting this blog for a while, you know I am working on a book about women’s sexuality.  This group is based on the same work.  I made a video to better explain what the group is about and how it will change your life.

You can find the current information for this group on my event page.  I would love it if you would join me on this journey!

Filed under: Body-Image,Groups,Pleasure,Sexual Being,Sexuality,Sexy Tiger,Video — admin @ 12:31 pm

December 2, 2011

Holiday Stresses!

It’s the most wonderful time of the year!  Or is it?

Now is the time when people often become overwhelmed with mile long To Do lists.  People start running around decorating and over-schedule their planners with holiday engagements.  Not only is it hard to find time to focus on your relationship…but relationships are often a source of stress this time of year!

If you and your partner have conflicting views on how (or where) to celebrate the holidays the following video offers some solutions.

Remember what is most important this time of year.  Remember what is most important in your life.  The holidays don’t have to be stressful.  It’s truly up to you.

Filed under: Family,Holidays,Relationship,Video — admin @ 11:37 am

November 14, 2011

What Are You Taking For Granted?

It’s easy to be grateful when big things happen.

Get your dream job and feel so unbelievably grateful!

Your partner buys you a really special gift and you may find yourself beaming!

Avoid a car accident and you may feel relief and gratitude wash over you!

What about every day gratitude?  What about appreciation for the small things?

What about gratitude for things that you just expect.  Are you grateful for hot water?  Are you grateful for the daily kiss or hug you get from your partner?

What might you be taking for granted?

Just because your partner ALWAYS takes the trash out, doesn’t mean you can’t be grateful for that.  Just because your partner has always turned you on and pleased you sexually doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be appreciative.  Sometimes when we stop expressing gratitude or appreciation we started expecting things or we take them for granted.  If you have ever felt unappreciated or taken for granted, you know how painful that can be.

Take a little inventory of your life.  For what are you grateful?  What would you hate to do without?  What would you really miss if it was gone?  Who would you really miss if they were gone?

Want to get gratitude going in your life?  Here are some posts on gratitude.

Filed under: Communication,Gratitude,Relationship,Video — admin @ 10:00 am

November 9, 2011

Mending Your Broken Heart

There is no magic way to mend your broken heart. It takes time, energy and loving support.

Allow yourself the time you need to grieve and mourn. You aren’t weak or wimpy if you feel sad after ending a relationship.  If you run from your feelings, they will catch up with you!

Take care of yourself.

Ask for what you need from your friends and family.

When you are ready, look at your relationship (the REAL relationship, not what you hoped it would be).  After you have evaluated what really happened, think about what you really want in your life and what you want in the future. Describe your ideal relationship. What is really important to you? What are you willing to settle for? Get clear about it so that you don’t walk blindly into your next partnership.

Let me say this one more time (just in case you are beating up on yourself and feeling like you need to speed up your process).

Take Your Time!

Let Yourself Grieve!

Don’t Ignore Your Feelings!

Ask For Support!

Then, when you are ready you can think about moving forward (only when YOU are ready though, there is no need to rush this process).

Here is more information about recovering after a break up –

Life After a Break-up – Recovering and Moving On

Recovering From a Break-up Part 2

Filed under: Grief,Relationship,Self-care,Self-love,Support,Video — admin @ 7:25 pm

October 14, 2011

Get the sex you want!

Have you ever been in a situation where your partner spends oodles of time licking away on a certain part of your body, but what you really want is to be kissed somewhere else?

Perhaps your partner is sweet and tender and tonight you really want to be taken in a way that feels rough or passionate.

On Studio6 we talked about getting the sex you want.

It’s OK to ask for something different in the bedroom. It’s OK to want things sexually. It’s more than OK to get the sex you want!

Filed under: Communication,Pleasure,Relationship,Sexuality,Video — admin @ 9:25 am

October 13, 2011

Are you ready to take your relationship to the next level?

Is it time to move in together?

Are you ready to get married?

Do you want to start a family?

Making life decisions in your relationship can be tricky. It’s especially complicated when you are ready but your partner isn’t.

There is no magic formula you can use to see if you are ready, but there are a couple things you can look at. There are some areas you need to address before moving forward. Make sure you have a conversation about finances, chores, values, family or parenting (depending on what step you are ready to take). Be clear about your desires. It’s important to speak your truth and to also be open to what your partner has to say. It can feel disappointing when you both aren’t ready to move in a certain direction. If you aren’t on the same page, make sure you revisit the topic because things can change.

Filed under: Change,Marriage,Relationship,Video — admin @ 9:05 am

October 11, 2011

What the F is Foreplay

I often hear from women that they want more foreplay. Foreplay can be a wonderful way to make sure you are both warmed up and ready to connect fully sexually. So what is it?

Foreplay happens after seduction and before the main event. If intercourse is the main event for you, oral sex might be foreplay. If oral sex is the main event, then foreplay might be a sensual massage that moves into heavy petting. Foreplay is more than just leaning over and giving your partner a squeeze. The most enjoyable foreplay wakes your partner’s body up and then turns your partner’s body on.

Foreplay (like seduction) can before very personal. One common theme is that it’s most exciting when someone takes his or her time with foreplay. A slow build up can be very tantalizing.

Step 1 – Find out your partner’s favorite kind of foreplay (the easiest way to do that is to ask).

Step 2 – Take your time with it!

Step 3 – Enjoy yourself!

Filed under: Intimacy,Pleasure,Relationship,Sexuality,Video — admin @ 8:21 am

October 8, 2011

What do you want in a relationship?

Can you picture your ideal relationship?  Do you know what you want it to look like?  What about your ideal partner?

If you are single and interested in dating, it’s a good idea to get clear about what you do (and don’t) want in a relationship or partner.  Make a list of what you want in a partner.  Be specific.  What are you willing to settle for?  What is a dating deal breaker?

It might not be possible to find one person who has every trait on your ideal list.  However, if you have a list that will give you a good map to refer to when you meet someone.  If you’ve written down what you want, you will be less likely to settle when you met someone and he or she doesn’t live up to your wish list.

Filed under: Dating,Relationship,Video — admin @ 8:36 am

October 4, 2011

De-Stress Your Relationship!

Work, kids, money woes, caring for loved ones, health problems, cooking, cleaning, organizing, responding to emails or phone calls, gearing up for the holidays – with all of these things vying for your time, how can you focus on your relationship?  Throw relationship struggles or conflict on top of that and your relationship can feel Full of STRESSS!

With mountains of things on your To Do list or begging for your attention, it can feel like there just isn’t time to connect with your partner.  Mackenzie Phillips stopped by the set of Studio 6 and we talked about a few ways to de-stress your relationship.

The best thing you can do for your relationship is to spend time together with intention.  Brainstorm things you like to do together.  Scheduled it on your calendar.  Or find simple ways to connect daily.  Carve out time for your relationship and enjoy the connection (and break from stress).

Looking for more ways to focus on your relationship?  Check out these posts.

Recharge Your Relationship

Connecting Daily Is Good for your Relationship

Filed under: Marriage,Relationship,Video — admin @ 8:38 am

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